Are You Suffering From Guilt And Shame?

This testimony, written by Michelle Steele, has featured in the November 2022 edition of Sid Roth’s newsletter.

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The doctor’s words verified what the symptoms had already told me. The baby in my womb was dead. The intense faith-filled prayer that my husband had prayed was drowned out by shame’s accusations roaring in my soul, “You are reaping what you sowed. You can’t receive a miracle from God. You have spent your life in addiction and prostitution, and now you are getting what you deserve!” I searched for the breastplate of righteousness the preacher said I had been given, but I only found shame.

My name is Michelle Steele. I spent years of my life in addiction and crime. From the time I ran away from home as a teenager to the age of 23, I descended deeper and deeper into a pit of destruction. I attempted suicide multiple times and died twice by accidental overdoses. My first husband died of an overdose the day after being sentenced to three counts of armed robbery. I lost custody of my children and ruined every relationship with my family. I didn’t think there was any hope for me until I heard the truth about Jesus. He died for me—to save me. It was the first time I believed that Jesus was personally interested in helping me be free. So, I accepted Him as my Lord and Savior and began living for Him.

I was so thankful to be free from the tormenting addiction, but the Lord had more in store for me. He began restoring my life! Day by day, I grew in my knowledge of God’s Word. I regained custody of my children and reestablished relationships with my family. The Lord brought Philip Steele into my life, a husband who loves me like Jesus loves the church. In the first year of our marriage, we were expecting a baby. It was this baby that I lost to shame’s lies.

Guilt and shame are two entirely different things. Guilt is the condition or standing I was in because of what I had done. Shame is the painful feeling in the conscience that guilt causes. Guilt affects how God can deal with me, but shame affects how I interact with God.

At that time, I believed that the blood of Jesus cleansed me of my sins, removing sin from my “record.” That was how I saw the “record.” That was how I saw the slate”—removed the guilty verdict. But that was as far as I had gone with the blood of Jesus.

I was still ashamed of MANY things. The shame sabotaged my faith when I needed God to preserve the life of my baby. God could have helped help me and wanted to help me. But the shame caused me to draw back from Him. Shame convinced me that I wasn’t righteous, so I accepted defeat and loss.

It took some time, but the Lord showed me that I needed to interact more with the blood of Jesus—to go further in my relationship and fellowship with the blood of the Lamb of God. I discovered this question in Hebrews 9:14 (KJV): “How much more shall the blood of Messiah…purge your conscience…?” Do you mean my conscience can be cleansed from the shame of my past? I NEED that cleansing! I had not gone far enough in my relationship with the blood!

In the Old Testament, I saw that blood was offered on the altar for the sins people had committed. But the blood was also sprinkled on the people to purify—a second interaction with the blood! Before that moment, my contact with the blood was to receive forgiveness of my sins. I needed to apply the blood of Jesus to purge my conscience!

So, I applied Jesus’ blood whenever I sensed shame. When condemnation arose about my past, I said, “The blood of Jesus cleanses me from the shame of that,” or “I apply the blood of Jesus to wash my conscience.” With my words, I sprinkled Jesus’ blood over my conscience until I began to see myself as holy and acceptable to God. I no longer viewed myself as a prostitute or addict but as a daughter of God!

This made the difference when our next child was born. The doctor said, “We aren’t sure whether it is a heart condition or her lungs.” They rushed her to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. This time, when my husband took his stand of faith, I was standing with him in faith. The shame was gone! Within a week, the doctor said, “This is our miracle baby!” She was completely restored!

Maybe you are asking, “Will this work for me?” Yes! Take time to establish faith in the blood of Jesus so that when you speak those words to apply the blood, there is confidence in what the blood of Jesus will do for you. These are some things that helped me see the supernatural ability of the blood of Jesus. By studying my resources, these truths will get deep into your spirit.

1. Jesus was born with sinless blood because He was not connected to Adam’s sinful blood.

Jesus was born of a virgin (Matthew 1:23, Luke 1:34). God sent His Word, and the Word became flesh (John 1:14). Jesus legally entered the earth through the womb of a woman but was born without Adam’s blood.

2. Jesus never sinned.

He was tempted in every way that we can be tempted (Hebrews 4:15), but He resisted sin, keeping His blood pure and holy. First Peter 1:19 says we were redeemed with the “…precious blood of Messiah Jesus, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot.”

3. The blood of Jesus is alive and speaking for us from the altar in Heaven.

Hebrews 12:22-24 (KJV) says, “But ye are come…to Jesus the mediator of the new covenant, and to the blood of sprinkling, that speaketh better things than that of Abel.” While the blood of Abel cried out for revenge, the blood of Jesus is calling for God’s covenant love and righteousness to help you overcome!

4. The blood of Jesus is the ONLY substance that can wash us to the point that we are justified in the sight of God (Romans 5:9).

Faith in Jesus’ blood will give you the confidence to apply the blood against the accusations of shame. The blood of Jesus will help you see yourself pure, cleansed, and holy in the sight of God. The boldness to enter God’s presence is by the blood of Jesus, so spend time honoring the blood by studying what the Bible says about it. Hebrews 10:19 (KJV) says, “Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus….”

Since I accepted Jesus, I have shared my testimony many times. People have been supernaturally set free from addictions as they hear what the Lord has done for me. I’ve seen people who have struggled for years set free instantly. But more people have responded with personal stories of triumph over shame, addictions, depression, and oppression after they learned to apply the blood correctly than I ever imagined! I pray that you will know greater freedom as you sprinkle the blood of Jesus on your conscience too.

Michelle Steele

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Friend, if you want Jesus to empower you to live a victorious, abundant life where your faith produces miracles , signs and wonders, and you don’t suffer from guilt and shame, you need to be born again. As Michelle made this choice, you also need to conscientiously give Jesus the right to rule and reign in your life. If you would like to do so, say the following words and mean them with all the sincerity of your heart:

Lord Jesus, I repent of my sins. I believe that you died on the cross to take my punishment. I believe that you rose from the dead and will come again to rule the world. Come into my heart, I make you my Lord and Saviour.

If you prayed this prayer you are now born again and you are a new creation, a child of God. Find a good Spirit-filled, Bible-based Church that will equip you to listen to the Holy Spirit and persevere in keeping the Word of God, not denying His Name in these troublesome times.

Infographic: As you think in your heart so are you (Proverbs 23:7)

This post is inspired by the book written by Dennis and Dr. Jen Clark entitled: Releasing the Divine Healer Within – The Biology of Belief and Healing.

I got inspired reading how “the brain has seven cognitive operators that allow us to interpret the world around us as mental perceptions. They control how sensory, thought, or memory inputs are related to each other and are translated into adaptive behaviors, thoughts, and emotions. However, the driving force behind our survival as a species is our emotional evaluation… The emotional operator ‘exists to assign an emotional valence to all the elements of perception and cognition… Without the emotional value function , we would move through the world like very intelligent robots…'” (page 39,40).

In an earlier episode of Sid Roth’s It’s Supernatural (see the embedded video below) the authors talk about the ease of being emotionally healed when we yield to Jesus the Forgiver and Jesus the Healer. They mention how all of our wrong thought constructions (i.e. strongholds) build upon toxic emotions that we burry in our hearts. And because the emotional value operator (which is located in the limbic center in the brain) is the one that gives importance to thoughts (causing the will to initiate actions), those emotions we have in our hearts will drive our behaviour. Hence, Proverbs 23:7 says, “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he [in behavior—one who manipulates]” (Amplified version).

But because Jesus the Healer, when yielded to, heals quickly, those toxic emotions are really easy to get rid of when you know and receive His love and forgiveness. Therefore, a personal revelation hit me: if your emotions are healed in an instant it practically means that all support for bad memories and thought patterns is removed and they are filtered out. This manifest as if you’ve “renewed your mind” in an instant.

Technically, this is not true, but because emotional value operator is the most important part in the human decision-making process, and because heart is no longer assigning any emotional value to bad thought patterns and memories,  they will not pass through the decision-making mechanism. Consequently your will will not act on them and your actions will not be influenced by something that was triggering you so easily in the past.

In other words, your will and actions will reflect the healing you’ve received and the strongholds built upon the toxic emotions that Jesus just healed would disappear completely from your consciousness. To illustrate this point I’ve made the attached infographic.

Infographic notes (top – down):

• Omnipresent God is written with transparent “ink” to highlight how Father God is not imposing His will upon us. He has “faded” into the background in order to hide Himself and allow us to exercise our own free will. 
• Man is a triune being having three parts – a body, a soul and a spirit. This infographic doesn’t show the physical (body) part, but if it would, it would be placed somewhere between the world (shown as a green cloud) and the “Sensory Input” function in the brain.
• God mainly influences us through our conscience and is a still small voice that is coming from our innermost being – our spirit.
• Man’s soul consists of the mind, will and emotions/heart.
• Mind is shown to contain above mentioned seven cognitive value operators,  thoughts, memory and input from the senses.
• The scripture says “as he thinks in his heart” (see Proverbs 23:7) indicating that heart is not just emotions but also performs some kind of thought processing. So, the above infographic shows that heart contains emotions and the emotional value operator. 
• The feedback loop is shown between the world and a man. With his own actions, spawned through his own free will, man acts in/upon the world. Consequences of those actions combined with other people actions and the reaction of the world itself are fed back to man as the “worldly feedback”.
• There is another input coming directly into man’s mind masquerading as his own thoughts – a demonic influence. Refer to the story in 1 Chronicles 21. It starts with, “Satan rose up against Israel and caused David to take a census of the people of Israel” (NLT version). Now, think of it. Did Satan appear to David to tell him about this idea. No, he just placed the idea in his mind and David, thinking of the benefits of such action, took it and ran with it (see 1 Chronicles 21:4). Don’t think that all thoughts you think are yours. Examine them and cast “down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5, NKJV, emphasis mine).

Friend, if you want to receive emotional healing described above, you would need to yield to Jesus the Saviour, Forgiver and Healer. If so, simply say the following words and mean them:

Lord Jesus, I repent of my sins. Come into my heart, I make you my Lord and Saviour.

Then close your eyes and put your hand on your belly. This is where Bible describes your emotional centre is – this is the heart Bible talks about (not your physical heart organ). Notice that your focus has shifted from your head into your heart. Open your heart to the Divine Healer, who is now in you – after you’ve said the above prayer, God has adopted you into His family and has given you a new spirit. You are born again and His Spirit lives inside you. Relax, don’t try. Welcome healing power into every cell of your body.

More practical healing “exercises” could be found in the book mentioned above.

Infographic: Twelwe Demonic Spirits And How To Get Rid Of Them

In one of my previous posts (see Infographic: Habits – Rule Them or Be Ruled By Them) I wrote a little bit about habits from a “scientific” perspective, trying to focus on their automatism and what man must do himself to get rid of the such. However, what that article failed to highlight is that man does have an adversary (see Genesis 3:15) and we are fighting against objective forces of evil.

Saint Paul said to Ephesians: “Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand” (Ephesians 6:10-13).

So, sometimes, it’s not just habits that one must overcome, he or she is fighting against the objective evil that is manifesting through strongholds in one’s consciousness. These strongholds are the wrong philosophy and/or outlook on life, which are driving the wrong thinking and behavioral patterns, which in turn are instigating wrong actions, which then create wrong habits. To get rid of the wrong habits in such a case a person must first remove the stronghold(s) from their consciousness.

As man’s philosophy and his outlook on life are brought about by his education (in his home and outside of it) it is important that this education would equip him with the proper knowledge of the authority God gave him as well as the tools to recognize when his thinking is not aligned with God’s will. There is a quote (generally attributed to Jesuits) which goes like this “Give me the child till the age of seven and I will show you the man.”

I’m sure that Jesuits meant that good, faithful and courageous people can be “built” through the faculty of early Christian education, however,  if someone would like to manipulate the mankind, he could use the same principle of early education to build a society where people have evil philosophy and a weird outlook about every aspect of life.

Obviously, if you connect the dots, you would conclude that the evil principalities, powers and the devil himself are surely working on bringing about this evil education for the whole mankind and the way how they “sell” it to the unsuspecting people is by using the step by step approach. The change is always gradual and it takes decades to solidify.

For example, it started with the sexual revolution in the 60’s, which replaced chastity with lust. This brought about sexual “freedom”, but as a consequence eroded people’s perception of the sanctity of the marriage to the point of regarding it as a piece of paper. In such environment family as the basic unit of society is not able to function properly anymore, being split and thorn apart. Such unfortunate situation creates all sort of behavioral problems in children, which are the people that will form the future society. Add to this the latest devil’s trick of institutionalizing gay marriage, and you will get a legal platform to educate our children furthermore in the ways of Sodom and Gomorrah.

So, let’s talk about the principalities and powers that Saint Paul has mentioned to Ephesians. I believe these are what Benny Hinn calls, in his book “Angels and Demons,” the twelve demonic strongmen and the infographic below is in fact inspired by what is written in that book.

In general all of these demonic strongmen are overcome by the blood of Jesus, the word of your testimony (of what is God doing in your life and how His grace is helping you) and by knowing who you are (i.e. not just a child of God, but an heir to the Kingdom and co-creator in Christ, all of which was made possible by Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross for you).

Then specifically, the spirit of fear is overcome by love, righteousness and strength. The spirit of heaviness is overcome by praise and joy. Peace and contentment overcome the spirit of jealousy and thanksgiving and worship overcome the spirit of pride. The spirit of infirmity and the deaf and dumb spirit are overcome by the blood of Jesus, and the rest are overcome by a choice you must make – to repent of the wrong thinking, to accept Jesus as your Savior and start a life-long relationship with God and to read who Bible says you are and what God would want you to do.